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When I learned I was going to have another baby, aside from being over the moon with happiness, a dark worry began to invade my thoughts. What if my sons don’t like each other? What if one likes the other, but it’s not mutual? How can I mitigate all the damage with sibling rivalry?

I did my best to brace my older son for the arrival of his brother, and to his credit, he handled it beautifully. It wasn’t the easiest time in our lives, being tired all the dang time, trying to figure out the future, and stave off my fears. And when the time came, I had to let go of my need for control and hope for the best.

And, to their credit, my sons like each other. A lot! Once we got our night routines down, our older son would greet his brother like the rest of us each morning. He’d ask for the baby to lay next to him in his bed, bring toys for him to share, and just wants to be close to him. In return, the baby thinks he hung the moon, saving all his biggest smiles for his big brother.

My heart soars when I see them together, and when we can cuddle together as a unit, I’m at my happiest. I have to brag, because it gives me such joy. It validates my decision to extend our family, but also shows me that maybe I’m not a complete fuckup as a parent, and I might have done an okay job raising these guys. But most of all, it gives me a moment of gratitude in a world of uncertainty and ugliness.