So, I made some resolutions for the year. Let’s see how I did, shall we?
- Be here now – I have trouble staying in the moment. My mind wanders and I lose the beauty in the experiences I’m having right now. My goal is to be more mindful about my life and try to appreciate what’s happening right here, right now. (Plus, I also want to re-read the book of the same name by Ram Dass. Because it’s awesome.)
Did I do any of this? Ha! Nope! I spent most of the year worrying about baby, being pregnant, nesting, and definitely NOT re-reading my favorite spiritual books.
- Kiddo’s speech – my son has a slight language delay due his constant ear infections as a baby. My goal this year is to find ways to support him, and help him improve his communication skills.
How’d this one go? Well, he’s improving. We’re working on his speech, but most of the progress has been his own regular old development. We’re managing at least one sentence “Mommy, Issa wike some more milk pwease.” And we’re doing better with manners (please, thank you, you’re welcome, here you go, and god bless you). But much more ground needs to be covered.
- Stay organized – Good lordt, do I need to keep working on this. I made good progress last year finishing two projects, but so many more are waiting for completion.
Nah. Not even close. Next!
- See friends – Being a mommy means you give up a huge chunk of your time. I miss my pals, and am going to make an effort to see my pals. (If this is you, consider yourself warned! lol)
HA!!! Being pregnant means you’re absolutely no fun, so no one invites you anywhere. Also, no one comes to your parties because they’re lame and child-themed. This is a big nope.
- Date night – See above. Gotta make time for us.
Yeah, no. This didn’t happen either. Being pregnant means I’m no fun on date night, and although we went out a few times, the regular goal I set did NOT happen. And given our current circumstances, it’s not likely to change because of that thing called disposable income, which is going away until my husband gets a new job.
- Normalize – I hold myself to ludicrous standards for so many things. I need to accept that I can make mistakes, fail and recover. I need to give myself permission to be human.
I wish I could say I did this, but I spent so much of my time holding myself to impossible pregnancy standards that I’ve actually never felt less normal than I have this year.
- Self care – I’m making a lot of progress here, but have a lot of room to grow.
Another one I dropped the ball with. I did have a lot of doctor’s appointments but not much else. I’m still in search of a new therapist, I only kept two hair appointments all year, and I pretty much gave up on the gym after the third trimester. So, no. Fail!
- Ambitious cooking – I’m a recipe hoarder, I’m going to start using or deleting recipes and building a nice repertoire.
Ah, how sad. I didn’t do much ambitious cooking. Truthfully, I was so exhausted during my pregnancy that my husband ended up doing almost all the cooking. The only exception was the weekly cake/brownie/muffin mix I would make with my son.
- Purge – Get RID of crap!!!
We actually did a bunch of this in making room for the baby. But there’s still so much to go.
- Focus – Get some direction on what I’m doing, and not just wait out the days.
God, I’ve never been more unfocused in my life. What was I thinking when I wrote these?
- Give a shit – There’s a lot of issues I just don’t know enough about, but want to. Here’s my opportunity.
Yeah, no. I totally checked out. Election years are exhausting.
- Exhale – Let go of the stuff I can’t change, forgive myself for my failings, and move on from things that hurt me.
Meh, I’ll give myself partial credit. I spent most of my pregnancy in an emotional state of exhaustion. I was so tired, I couldn’t care about stuff. Probably not the way to approach things, but that’s the way it went.
Overall, these goals were probably reasonable for someone who wasn’t pregnant, exhausted, and super depressed and anxious all the time. They were written before some major life changes happen, and seem quaint and silly looking back. However, moving forward, I’m hoping to write something a bit more reasonable for 2017 given the circumstances. We’ll have to wait and see.