So I just need to vent about something, guys. Did you ever get the feeling in some of your relationships with people in your life like like this:
Like you’re God (not in the literal sense) but the one pushing so hard to contact the other person, and they’re just like Adam, going “Meh, I’ll just fling a finger toward you with no effort.” Look at the determination on God’s face, all his angel wingmen holding him up like, “errrfff! I can almooooost get him, you guys, just a little closer.” and Adam’s like, “I’m just chilling here and oh, look, it’s God. Hey man…cool robe.”
I’m being a bit dramatic, but I’m trying to organize a thing. And putting it together is stressing me out. And I need people to respond to the thing. AND THEY JUST WON’T??? Without getting into specifics, and I really, really hate to rag on people, but these folks are the actual worst at responding to simple requests for information.
Like God, my husband and I are ALWAYS the ones tasked with organizing every get-together with this group of people. We are NEVER invited to the things they want to do, only finding out stuff’s happening after the fact. As much as this stings, we try very hard to maintain these relationships, out of obligation, and because we figure perhaps they’re not doing it on purpose. I’ve been told they are “linear thinkers” and that we genuinely don’t cross their mind in planning, which hurts even more. Because I can think linearly too, and I try not to exclude people from stuff they might enjoy.
But this thing we’re planning (and yes, I’m being deliberately vague because the thing hasn’t happened; I’ll post about the inevitable shit show after it happens) is important to me and my family. The thing we’re planning is exclusively to their benefit, and we can’t even get the courtesy of a response. In one specific case, one person who won’t respond to texts actually liked some of my pics on instagram while I was texting them. So, after not getting a response, I messaged them privately on instagram, figuring this was the best way to reach them. My message was marked as seen, but alas, no response.
Okay. So, I’m just feeling like I’m the bad guy here? And maybe that’s how they see me, a nagging, pain in the ass, who just won’t stop until she gets answers. And yeah, maybe I am that. But I’m nagging to make sure I have enough food for you. Like who doesn’t want enough pizza? And the thing I need them for is literally 10 minutes away from them (but almost 2 hours away for me). I can’t help but feel a disparity in the effort and inconvenience.
And, unfortunately, I’m going to have to have a conversation with them in person. If they show up, that is. And I loathe confrontation, but honestly, I don’t know what else to do. Without a mutual sense of effort, I feel frustrated and drained. And they still get to show up without consequence and have all the pizzas. Rude.