Here’s a pretty harsh truth of recent revelation to me. I think everyone has certain people in their lives, the people constantly expect you to be continually tuned into their every waking emotion. From Facebook status updates to the third level of implied emotion which must be intuited from text messages, the life of a hyper-empath such as myself is an overwhelming inundation of the emotions of others.
What strikes me though is that few of these folks ever really gives a shit about how I’m feeling. On the rare occasion that someone actually bothers to inquire, it’s only a conversational place holder, designed to give the illusion of concern. But really, the question serves to give appropriate pause before diving into whatever it is that person wants to say. The only way to truly be the center of attention is to direct it at all times, momentarily onto another, but then solely refocusing on the star.
I wish I could say that I’m used to it by now, and most of the time, that’s probably true. It happens so frequently, I barely notice. But on days like today, when nothing wants to work out in my favor, when I’m emotionally wrecked, and feeling like I have no ally, the silence is more than I can bear.