One of my favorite things about logging into my blog’s dashboard is seeing the search criteria that brings people to my website. I don’t advertise the blog, really. A few people in my real life read it, but most of my hits come from anonymous humans mashing terms into search engines. A majority of them are looking for hints on Draw Something. This one, though, was I think the most appropriate phrase for both my blog and me as a person:
“obsession with impossible tasks”
The manifestation of most of my diagnosable mental health issues stems from those four words. I’ve spent far too much of my 32 years on this planet humping away at trying to do the impossible, and then ruminating ad nauseum on why it doesn’t work. I hate it, but it’s something I’ve been doing so long I can’t imagine a way to stop. It may even be something that’s so hardwired into my DNA, that I may not be able to undo it.
But, it is reassuring that there are others out there who feel the same way. The search terms, in a weird way, makes me aware that I’m not the only person undertaking Sisyphean tasks. I don’t know what post they even happened upon during their search or if it was what they were looking for. If you’re out there, friend, you’re not alone. The awkward saurus knows how you feel.